Death in the Family

This conversation took place while I was putting on my nightgown since all of my pajama pants are in the wash. I haven't worn this particular nightgown in several months, and being that it has polka dots and horizontal stripes, I look pretty big in it.

Me: "Oh my goodness honey! LOOK AT ME! This is horrible! Look at how huge I look!

Casey: "Wow, sweetie. You'd better take that off before you stretch it out. Would you like me to go get a tarp from the garage for you to wear? I have rope, I can fashion you a belt."

"Panama City Officials have confirmed the body found was that of Casey Sebold. Though autopsy results have not been released, the medical examiner is tentatively stating his death was caused by strangulation. Mr. Sebold's wife, Lyndsey, could not be found for comment."