What do you do when you find out someone you know is pregnant?
If you have experience with infertility, you can fake a smile long enough to get through the day. Even if you don't like that person, you can muster up enough happiness to be almost excited for them. You know what a wonderful thing it is to want a baby.... But once you get home, all masks are off.
So...what do you do when you find out someone is pregnant...but that someone you have spent years not liking out of principle? What if that person is now going to be apart of your family because of this pregnancy? What if you HAVE to pretend to be excited, because this child is going to be family, and no matter what your circumstances are...family is family, and you have to love them anyway?
I can tell you that, at least in my case....finding this out made me literally physically ill. (A nice hibachi dinner down the toilet....pun intended.) I know that the person who told me had the best of intentions...better for me to find out now than to find out after the baby is born. "Hey Lyndsey...by the way, meet your nephew!" I think it would have hurt worse to know that the entire pregnancy was hidden from me. Then again....I don't know. It's not fair. The whole situation sucks...and it's making me so angry that I can't think. And it's making me so jealous and hateful that I want to go up to my brother and punch him in the face for being an idiot.
It's not fair that young people who are too stupid to put on a condom or use birth control are getting pregnant every day. It's not fair that there are people who do everything right (i.e. get married FIRST, then have a family) are not able to have children. Where's the justice in that?
Why do I have to try so hard? Why can't I have the fairy tale?
I'm going to bed. I can't do this anymore tonight.
8 years ago
5 comments:
Here is what you do.
You cry, you complain to your husband. You bang your fists on the table and cry again.
Eat ice cream.
And no, you don't have to be happy for them. You don't have to pretend. This is BAD news. And until they are married you don't in any way have to pretend that this is exciting or fun for their sake.
Be a wonderful Aunt ZZ to that baby (aka, be yourself). But no. This is not good news in any way shape or form.
If they were married it would be totally different, but they aren't. So you have absolutely no obligation to pretend anything (though if they DO end up getting married, then you need to be supportive.)
Oh, Lyndsey. BLECH. So so so sorry. This is so rotten.
they are idiots. and their parade will be rained on. they truly have no clue. poor kid.
I am sorry you are having to deal with this. I have asked myself the same questions over and over again. If I can do anything or if you need to just vent through it, I am here...anytime!
love you. as you know.
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