I am very up-and-down lately. I have to try very hard to keep my smile on, to not let people see how much I'm hurting. I don't hurt all the time...but when it hits me, it hits me hard. It has not escaped my notice that my would-be due date is just a few weeks away...and that really sucks. It's just creeping here, and I feel like it's going to rush up and slap me in the face. I find myself trying to figure out how to just skip that date altogether and have it not exist.
One of my fellow-inferile buddies is pregnant after 6 years of trying. So so so so happy for her. And for the first time ever, the happiness for her and her family was not marred by bitterness and anger at my own unfortunate situation. I actually felt a little tiny glimmer of hope. I was a little surprised by it, but it felt nice.
From Josh Groban's - Believe
Believe in what your heart is saying
Hear the melody that's playing
There's no time to waste
There's so much to celebrate
Believe in what you feel inside
And give your dreams the wings to fly
You have everything you need
If you just believe
3 comments:
I had no idea it was so close! I'm so sorry.
thinking about you - as always. loving you - more than ever. you can do this, i know you can.
I didn't realize it was so close either. Hugs!!
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